Insomniac!!!

Help I can't sleep, maybe if I took my meds I could calm down a little. Most of you don't know that I hap PPD with my son so in order to stop that from happening this time I took meds from KK's birth. I haven't been keeping up with them though as I forget to take care of myself. Now I've been having panic attacks and memory lapses but the worst is the insomnia. But I'm too afraid to take anything for that bc I'm afraid I won't wake up for the baby. Hopefully soon I get myseld straightened out. I would love to get some sleep. But on the plus side my house is looking pretty clean, I'm keeping up with paying the bills on time, and I'm taking care of the kids. I think I need to have somebody take them soon so that I can get some rest and get myself back on a schedule. I have to return to work on Wed and I'm not looking forward to getting up at 6:30 but then I don't have to get the kid's dressed and I could pack their bag the night before but who knows what time they will go to bed for me. AAAAAh! I never had to do this with Koco because I didn't go back to work with him until August. I don't feel like I've had enough time with KK. Speaking of not sleeping I went out the other night with Nikki and the girls, it was her first time since she had Nick. I know she had fun but I was too tired, hungry, and bored to enjoy myself. I'm turning into too much of a mom. Well I had better go try to sleep again Koco and KK will be up in about 3 hours and I've got to make sure K gets off to work.